ohoy!!! konnichiwa minna!!!!
ni pehal laks si princess ni tetibe cakap jepun laks??
hohohohhhhh... ape salahnye kan???
lame dah tak datang sini...
hmm... banyak yang dah terjadik...
since last entry.
so many things happens, occurred... to me especially.
semenjak dua menjak ni i asek emo jek...
tak tau nape..
sume tak kene.
tu tak kene. ni tak kene.
pastu rase cam nak lempang orang jek...
isshhhhh!!! hati ni panas jek...
ntah lah...
i'm feeling more lonely.
like i'm slowly fading away.
or rather people around me fading away...
oh ye.
last time. erm... bile i pon tak hengat tapi bulan ni gak.
FINALLY I'VE SAID IT.
I CONFESSED TO HIM.
I TOLD HIM EVERYTHING ABOUT WHAT I FEEL (ISSIT? OR THERE'S MORE?)
WHO?
well, kalau uols alert pasal i, uols akan tau secara otomatiknye sape.
yes. you're right. HIM.
uols leh rujuk entry-entry i yang lepas-lepas untuk keterangan lanjut.
*susah sangat rujuk tags untuk entry nih. senang kan?*
ape yang i cakap kat dia?
ermm... macam-macam gak...
erm... i rase i tak leh nak gi tau sebab THIS IS BETWEEN ME AND HIM.
tapi rasenye cam i mintak putus ngan dia.
*perghhh.... bukannye couple betul pon!*
nape i buat camtu?
sebab... sebab...
i pon tak tau nape...
but the most important thing is
I KENE BAGITAU DIA APE YANG I RASE SELAMA NI.
i cam dah rase terbeban sangat selagi i tak cakap dengan dia.
KALAU BOLEH I NAK CAKAP DIRECT JEK TAPI CAM LAH BOLEH KAN?
or.. should i send him a letter?
so dia boleh paham dengan lebih lanjut?
lagi pon , i gi tau dalam twitter.
ntah dia bace ntah tidak.
KALAU DIA BACE, I FEEL RELIEVED. SEBAB MEMANG I NAK DIA BACE.
KALAU DIA IGNORE....
MEMANG @!#$%^&*&^%$#@! SEBAB HE SHOULD AND MUST READ IT.
TAPI.. TAK PE LAH...
if he didn't read it...
lagi pon i dah tak kisah dah pasal dia.
lantak pi la dia nak wat pa.
i don't want to get involved, associated or even in touch with him.
*pffttttt princess ni marah ka pa?*
no... not marah... well, maybe... but...
how to put this?
i sendiri tak tau camna nak eksplen.
abih ayat dah nak kata.
YES I STILL FOLLOW HIM ON TWITTER.
AND TIPU LAH LAU I CAKAP I TAK STALK TWITTER DIA.
AND I STILL HAVEN'T REMOVED HIM FROM MY PRIVATE TWITTER LIST.
IN FACT, DIA SORANG JA YANG I WAT LIST KAT TWITTER.
uols see, how f***king special mamat sorang nih?
and nape i dok cerita panjang lebaq pasai dia kat sini?
because... he still unable to be deleted completely from my life.
i nak jek tulih kat sini yang dia nih *beep*...
yang dia nih *beep*...
yang i *beep* dia...
yang... banyak lagi lah...
ha... tang *beep tu bukan mencarut tau...
just the words are quite harsh to be written here.
but yes, i write that to him.
and kat dunia ni hanya sorang ja i bagi tau apa yang i cakap kat mamat tu dalam twitter.
she's totally understandable... and in fact, she's the first person i ever talked to in twitter.
i banyak cakap ngan dia especially about that guy. our private convo in twitter... only us girls know.
if uols terase nape i tak share ngan uols, gomenne...
i nih jenis yang private and i'm a chooser.
i sendiri cakap ye yang i ni pemilih. i pilih sape yang worth knowing my secrets.
not everyone can know. eventhough that person is super close with me.
and not all worth my trust.
i can trust people. but i never trust any of them 100%.
even my own parents.
TAPI I TRUST ALLAH 100%.
and i think ape yang i buat nih walaupun i dummo if it's 100% correct but i feel more options are coming.
sejak i decided to forget him (well maybe not completely) i feel more... consistent?
i dapat focus kat work i. i rase cam tak terbeban dah kepala hotak nih..
i feel more organized.
tu pasai lah i lama tak mai sini. sebab i telah membusy kan diri i ngan work sampai la ni i dah tak tau nak wat pa sebab most work i dah settle \(^0^)/
if not... dalam pala otak nih tak dak benda lain nak pikir. asek mamat tu dok bersarang.
langsung tak leh nak konsentret!
pastu malam tadi...
i decided tuk buang sume gambaq-gambaq and video pasai dia dalam phone i.
sebab lau ada, i mesti rase sebak, nak nangis pastu mula la ilang arah, ilang fokus, ilang punca...
cam-cam lagi yang ilang...
i dah tak dengaq lagu dia dah. sora dia. muka dia adelah gak kenkadang i tengok. sebab dia ade tweet gambaq dia.
ha ye.
dia nak mai bulan depan.
tapi i tak pi.
wat pa? bazir duit and masa.
*sorry uols if my words are bit harsh. i'm pointing my opinions*
duit yang beratus tu baik i belanja shopping. like two days ago.
i berjaya *hohhohohhhh* beli sebuah beg kaler pink.
bagusnye ade kaler itam atau merah tapi tak dak pulak. orz
lagi pon i tak kisah la dia nak mai, tak mai.. lantak pi lah.
i know my dongsaeng nak sangat pi. and i penah janji ngan dia nak pi sama but JinAh dear, i'm so sorry.
i can't. i just can't. *bows*
dah lah..
lagi i cerita pasai dia, lagi tak keruan i.
kang i jadik gila, masuk permai memang i nak saman dia.
*mentang-mentang lah hospital permai tu dekat ngan umah i!*
erm.. tu jek lah kot.
OK. BYES. XOXO
ah ye.
pas ni call i Risa yek. jangan lupe.
*cam japanese sket! hohohohhhh (^0^)/ *
Ija pon leh gak. memang tu nick name i.
but i just wanted to start fresh.
even twitter i pon i dah ubah username i.
takde dah nak menyangkutkan name dia ngan i dah.
cukup-cukup lah tu.
aishhh...
ok lah.
BYE-BYE ♥♥;
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