mood : i don't want to describe it
music : the GazettE - chizuru (thousand cranes) how perfect
minna...
can i asked you something? what if there's this one thing that you should let go but you just can't? i am struggling. struggling to let go. this pointless emotions i'm having but it's hard. no matter how hard i tried.
last two nights i crying myself to sleep again. it's very seldom now but it still happens. this shit still happens. i said to myself, why can't i think about ruki? or saga? or reno for god sake? i did think about these guys but eventually my mind went back to him. in the end, every night, before i went to sleep, it was him i thought about. and that very last two nights i cried. i went off around 2300 and i woke up again around 0100, couldn't stop thinking about him. i kept thinking, how was he's doing... haven't he eaten? is he slept yet? and it's overflowing. my tears can't stop flowing. then i asked myself again. what the hell is wrong with me? why is this happening to me? why me? WHY ME? what did that guy did that makes me went head over heels? did he spellbound me or something? fuck this!
i just read the lyrics to the new song from his band. but what triggers me to read the lyrics was this gif photo. gomene i don't want to post it here. i got rather distracted by the gif credit to whoever made it. i stopped at this gif on my tumblr dashboard. i'm not gonna lie that when i first saw it i was startled. there were so many emotions rushed into my body, i feels like i'm going to explode by seconds. then, when i read the lyrics, it's like we told each other our exact same feelings. because everything written on that lyrics is what i feels right now. even before. even back then, when the time i've decided to forget about him. i... hate to admit but my feelings for him is more than love. but i don't think he ever felt it. HE WILL NEVER FEELS IT. and one more thing. I HAVEN'T LISTEN TO THE SONG YET. i don't think i am able to listen to it. to listen to his voice... again... i might BREAK.
.......
forever alone....
forever emo....
music : the GazettE - chizuru (thousand cranes) how perfect
minna...
can i asked you something? what if there's this one thing that you should let go but you just can't? i am struggling. struggling to let go. this pointless emotions i'm having but it's hard. no matter how hard i tried.
last two nights i crying myself to sleep again. it's very seldom now but it still happens. this shit still happens. i said to myself, why can't i think about ruki? or saga? or reno for god sake? i did think about these guys but eventually my mind went back to him. in the end, every night, before i went to sleep, it was him i thought about. and that very last two nights i cried. i went off around 2300 and i woke up again around 0100, couldn't stop thinking about him. i kept thinking, how was he's doing... haven't he eaten? is he slept yet? and it's overflowing. my tears can't stop flowing. then i asked myself again. what the hell is wrong with me? why is this happening to me? why me? WHY ME? what did that guy did that makes me went head over heels? did he spellbound me or something? fuck this!
i just read the lyrics to the new song from his band. but what triggers me to read the lyrics was this gif photo. gomene i don't want to post it here. i got rather distracted by the gif credit to whoever made it. i stopped at this gif on my tumblr dashboard. i'm not gonna lie that when i first saw it i was startled. there were so many emotions rushed into my body, i feels like i'm going to explode by seconds. then, when i read the lyrics, it's like we told each other our exact same feelings. because everything written on that lyrics is what i feels right now. even before. even back then, when the time i've decided to forget about him. i... hate to admit but my feelings for him is more than love. but i don't think he ever felt it. HE WILL NEVER FEELS IT. and one more thing. I HAVEN'T LISTEN TO THE SONG YET. i don't think i am able to listen to it. to listen to his voice... again... i might BREAK.
.......
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